I have a new girlfriend!

Yep. What the title says. It was completely unexpected and I wasn't looking at all, but a beautiful woman leapt into my heart through my eyes and my skin and I fell for her, hard.

This is apropos of nothing, other than, I suppose: be sober + be body-confident + be clear-headed + be awake + be able to actually leave my room and go out and socialize + don't be a flaky asshole = hit the happiness jackpot, sometimes.

I successfully applied for Medicaid and have filled out my FAFSA, and am adopting a dog very soon and getting my Basic Group Fitness certification even sooner. So big adulty things like getting my own health insurance, going back to school, becoming more employable, and willingly taking on responsibilities are happening with a lot greater ease than I ever imagined.

My mental health is excellent right now. And hopefully it is not done getting better.

30 Days of Thin: Day Two

Too lazy to type out exactly everything I ate today. A summary: almond milk, a veggie wrap, greek yogurt, strawberries, nuts. 
Total: 956 calories.

Question: How tall are you? Do you like your height?
I'm 5'10", and I don't like it very much. On one hand, it helps me look strong and athletic, but on the other hand, it decimated my competitive dance career, made me a target for bullying in school, and is a factor in making me look intimidating to some, rather than looking as submissive and harmless as I am.

To T or not to T?

Playing With Your Food For Grown-Ups

(I'm partially x-posting from my MPP in PS, so for any PSers reading this, sorry for the redundancy!)

I relapsed again a few days ago, and decided to give habit-switching another shot. Instead of getting high on alcohol, I am going to get high on calorie restriction. Does this mean my ED is back? Well, as long as I stay in the driver's seat, the answer is NO. I'm just having a bit of sober fun.

I found an old tag called "30 days of thin," and I'm going to give it a go. It started off as a 'healthy weight loss' tag but of course it got co-opted and corrupted. The idea is to answer one trigger question per day for thirty days. The first and last questions are "what are your stats?" and "what are your stats now?" so it's meant to be done as a companion to a pro-ana diet, in which hopefully you'd lose some weight in the thirty days and have success to report at the end. I'm not going to follow a particular diet, but I'm just going to keep my calories under 1000 per day.

So, Day One:
30 - the almond milk in my coffee throughout the course of the day
60 - six almonds
72 - apple
448 - eight shrimp gyoza
60 - sesame oil
15 - low sodium soy sauce
60 - honey in my tea
Total: 745

Question: what are your stats?
Height: 5'10"
HW: 170 (BMI 24.4)
LW: 138.5 (BMI 19.9)
CW: 164.6 (BMI 23.6)
...and I don't have any other stats 'cause I don't take measurements.

Within the first ten days, I am going to get under 161 lbs. That's "GW1", if you like.